Some of you may be following the Miley Cyrus/Sinead O/Connor debacle. Basically due to concern over Miley's recent performance on the Video Music Awards, her Wrecking Ball video, and then Miley saying that she was inspired by Sinead's work, Sinead wrote an open letter to Miley. Sinead voiced her concern that Miley was allowing the music industry to exploit her. Miley replied immediately by shaming Sinead for having mental illness.
First of all, I can't even believe I wrote the paragraph above. I feel like I am in high school with a bunch of petty girls who don't know how to communicate directly with each other.
Second, I believe both Sinead and Miely behaved poorly in this encounter. Indirect communication almost always ends in fighting and slander. I do understand the greater purpose in open letters and possibly why Sinead made that choice. Open letters are not only for the person you are writing to, but they are a social commentary, written to bring larger issues to light to society. Sinead's letter was not really just a message for Miley, but for the music industry as well and to raise awareness in our society about the industry and how it exploits people. I think it was also a message to young women who might idolize Miley and want to act like her.
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| Copyright: Katie Norris |
This whole thing is a great example of why every person with mental illness knows it is not safe to tell our story and it is not safe to ask for help when we need it. In her last tweet Sinead says "I realize I will be in trouble for saying this but...Ireland is a VERY hard place to find help in. So having tried other ways first, I'm asking."
She was right. She did get in trouble for asking for help and being proactive about her treatment. Two years later it is being used against her.
While I am not thrilled with the indirect communication between these two women and the vitrol with which both of them communicate, I do think that this whole ordeal brings up a few of the issues people with mental illness struggle with.
First is that we are not free to ask for help or tell our story because other people will not only judge us negativly in our time of need, but also for the rest of our lives.
Second it shows how if you talk about your mental illness, few people ever take your seriously again and they will use your illness against you if they have a disagreement with you.
Third it points out just how hard it is for people with mental illness to find work. Sinead came out with another open letter to Miley stating: "If you cannot apologize I will have no choice but to bring legal precedings against you since it is extremely hard to be given work when people think one is suffering from mental illness."
Fourth, Sinead's statement quoted above shows a deeper issue in society. We tend to promote a myth that mental illness goes away, that you recover from it and it never effects you again. We like this myth because it is convenient for society to think it's an illness that can be cured. For those of us living with it we play into the myth as well because we know society cannot handle the reality that mental illness is a chronic illness so we cover up the fact that we live with it every day. For some people yes, the illness is something they completely recover from, but this is rare. In order for people to hire you, listen to you, even think you deserve a family or a life at all, you have to pretend like you are fine most of the time. I find it sad that even those of us living with mental illness have to pretend like we don't have it because society does not understand that even in the midst of pretty severe illness we can work and be reliable.
I think this whole Cyrus vs. O'Connor thing has gotten way out of hand. They are just both shaming each other back and forth. When we use shame tactics to "teach" others, it never works out well. Shame destroys people and I think we can see how this is happening to both of these women.
Blessings,
Rev. Katie
If
you cannot apologize I will have no choice but to bring legal
proceedings against you since it is extremely hard to be given work when
people think one is suffering from mental illness. - See more at:
http://perezhilton.com/2013-10-04-miley-cyrus-third-open-letter-from-sinead-oconnor-facebook-feud#sthash.Wxj4Id8H.dpuf
If
you cannot apologize I will have no choice but to bring legal
proceedings against you since it is extremely hard to be given work when
people think one is suffering from mental illness. - See more at:
http://perezhilton.com/2013-10-04-miley-cyrus-third-open-letter-from-sinead-oconnor-facebook-feud#sthash.Wxj4Id8H.dpuf
If
you cannot apologize I will have no choice but to bring legal
proceedings against you since it is extremely hard to be given work when
people think one is suffering from mental illness. - See more at:
http://perezhilton.com/2013-10-04-miley-cyrus-third-open-letter-from-sinead-oconnor-facebook-feud#sthash.Wxj4Id8H.dpuf
Sad, but true. Doesn't stop me from saying my truth & advocating, but I can see why so many of us stay quiet, especially when we need help. Had I reached out for help in my 20's instead of hiding my "crazy" & keeping it to myself, I could've stayed out of the mental hospital in my 30's. Shame kept me sicker & sicker until I finally had to raise the white flag. That's why advocacy is so important - so we can relate to each other & heal! Xoxo
ReplyDeleteIt is important for those of us with the ability to, to be advocates so hopefully one day everyone can ask for help. I have been asking for help since I was six years old but was not taken seriously until I was 19! We not only deal with personal feelings of shame but then the shame our community puts on us! I am so glad you are an advocate. Your voice is really needed!
DeleteI think Miley needs to educate herself about mental illness before blowing her wad about a subject and people she knows nothing about. Many famous artists, politicians, scientists have or had mental illness. When she trashed Amanda Bynes and Sinead O'Connor, she also trashed people like Robin Williams, Sting, Jim Carey, Margot Kidder, Patty Duke and others who are brilliant talented people who are creative because of their illnesses, not in spite of it. Unfortunately, real creativity can require the mind to go into different areas, some of them painful. Ludwig Van Beethoven had bipolar disorder. He wrote amazing symphonies and was stone cold deaf when he did. His illness was a conduit for his creativity. In 500 years people will still know who he was and will still be listening to his music. Who will remember Miley? No one.
ReplyDelete